


Rose stands in a small room alone with. DAVE. STRIDER.

by itsrose



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Doomed Timelines, M/M, Meteorstuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-28
Updated: 2020-02-28
Packaged: 2021-02-28 01:21:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22935511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsrose/pseuds/itsrose
Summary: the man the legend yeahhhh baby
Relationships: Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas
Comments: 7
Kudos: 23





	Rose stands in a small room alone with. DAVE. STRIDER.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [itsdave](https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsdave/gifts).



Rose and Dave stand in the village square.  


DAVE: hey  
ROSE: Hi, Dave.  
DAVE: yeah  
ROSE: Yeah?  
DAVE: yeah i think so  
ROSE: Um.  
ROSE: All right...  
ROSE: ...  
DAVE: no you need to plug in the aux before turning it on or it doesnt recognize it  
ROSE: I need to... turn on the "aux" or it... what?  
DAVE: ugh hold on  
DAVE: hey  
ROSE: Hey?  
DAVE: hey cant you seen im on the phone im on the FUCKING phone im helping vriska or terezi or whatever theyre all the same with some delicate equipment on the phone  
ROSE: uh-  
DAVE: i dont need anyone calling to interrupt especially not some jackass wholesome FUCK such as yourself  
DAVE: I HATE YOU! YOU BLOW! AGH FUCK  
ROSE: Dave! What? What did I do? I am sad now!  
DAVE: oh wait hold up  
DAVE: hey  
ROSE: ...  
DAVE: rose?  
ROSE: Am I still holding up?  
DAVE: oh haha no i was saying that to gamzee  
ROSE: Gam... zee...?  
ROSE: He's here? I don't...  
DAVE: ah no im on the phone with him  
DAVE: he interrupted my call with karkat  
ROSE: Oh! Oh, wow, what a relief. I thought you were yelling at me.  
ROSE: Wait, I thought you said you were talking to Terezi?  
DAVE: whatever you think i care  
DAVE: how anyone can keep them straight is a mystery to me  
DAVE: like seriously you need to learn like 20 new stupid names in hivebent alone i had to read it once through just to learn them and read it again to figure out what the hell was going on  
DAVE: really how did that whole revenge chain go again  
DAVE: vriska like fed terezi to her mom so aladin flew to her house and killed her with skrillex  
ROSE: Who?  
DAVE: sorry  
DAVE: sonny moore  
ROSE: Ah.  
ROSE: What?  
DAVE: i was just saying id be having a lot of an easier time remembering whatever happened to any of the trolls if i could just remember their names  
DAVE: and id have a lot easier time remembering them if they were normal names  
DAVE: names like jacqueline or cuthburt  
ROSE: Yes. Cuthbert, The Named Man.  
DAVE: yeah names like jaundice or anthony  
DAVE: bastard stu  
DAVE: not like  
DAVE: bastik putnam  
DAVE: pfizer tolmey  
DAVE: kohdak estman  
DAVE: fransi sbacon  
DAVE: djonav aarkke  
ROSE: Is Karkat still waiting for you?  
DAVE: yeah hes waiting he thinks hell get in my pants if he just digs his heels in and asks me out every single fucking day  
DAVE: play the long game hes desperate  
DAVE: i already told him im not interested in his rancid scrote  
ROSE: I meant, waiting for you to answer him on the phone.  
DAVE: oh yeah wow hold on  
DAVE: hey gamzee  
DAVE: nah fuck you  
DAVE: dunk chode gamzee you got that  
DAVE: dunk some fucking chode  
DAVE: ok bye yeah catch you later lol bye  
DAVE: karaka?  
DAVE: hey did you get it set up yet?  
DAVE: no that wasnt a racial slur i would never call you that  
DAVE: is there even an analog to being white on alternia  
DAVE: even if there were i dont think youd be it  


and so........  


ROSE: Hey, we've had a lot of fun here today.  
DAVE: haha yeah i know i was laughing  
ROSE: Hee hee.  
ROSE: But you know what isn't fun?  
BOTH: Leptospirosis.  
ROSE: Many infections go unnoticed for years, ultimately leading to liver disease and kidney failure.  
ROSE: Please bring your dog to the vet for a full urinalysis annually.  
DAVE: maybe even twice  
ROSE: Maybe.  


**Author's Note:**

> DUNK CHODE GAMZEE


End file.
